Suspended

My ''life'' was suspended most beautifully, ''surreally'' (in retrospect and in comparison to now, it was beautiful despite the cold and longing for Yannick) for a month in Italy, and now it's December and near Christmas. I am back and in full swing at work, but I still have not felt the ''panic'' of realising it’s year-end... something I used to feel.

I came back to various shocking news - about my dad, my personal relationship, the company I work in….

And so I '' suspended '' living, my life, my nostalgia, one more time, and went numb….

But I am slowly feeling "Italy-sick'' - I bought pandoro ...and yet another box of Baci... and cooked pici and pasta... even though whenever I went out with friends, I stressed, ''no pasta and western food’’!

I had spent so much time writing about Franca my landlady, because ''kindness'' is little simple inexpensive acts. Friendship does not cost a lot: sitting together - she knitting and me at the laptop and both glancing at the TV from time to time ... but it brought us warmth and lots of appreciation from me, a foreigner.

Because of all this, I have created this blog.

A Piece of Italy

Nostalgia Wormed its Way into My Heart - Sat 10 Dec
I was at Jason’s and could not help buying a pandoro. I saw the Perugina brand of panetonne and felt images of my stay there flooding me.

I went home to cook the pici I had bought in Siena, for my lunch.

We are Singapore - Sun 11 Dec
Singapore is a safe haven. I live here. I am part of the scheme here, and I have to contribute to it. By being the victim of a spot check at Tanjong Pagar MRT station.

Do I look like a terrorist? Ok, so I was alone, and OK, so I was carrying a back-pack.

Most importantly, I had to fulfil the police’s quota of checking X number of people in Y number of minutes’ interval. Singapore’s grand ‘’plan’’, ‘’vigilant system’’ to assure the world we are number one, we are safe, we are a great place to live and invest your business in.

She saw me walking into the station and caught my eye. There was no one else. She had to pick on me. She approached me to see my bag, and I glumly opened it. She cursorily glanced at it for a second and said OK, eager to fill her form, to report back to the HQ that she has done her job, that we are safe: we are Singapore.

We are ‘’Organised’’, We are ‘’Efficient’’ - Mon 12 Dec
That’s what we like to think of ourselves. And when things don’t work according to the way we are used to in another country, we say they are ‘’messy, back-ward, low tech, disorganised, inefficient’’.

Let us look at it from another angle. In Perugia, the queue sometimes is long and ‘’slow’’ to move. The service staff at the counter takes a long time to attend to one customer. But it is one on one, face to face, human interaction and attention. They are ‘’backward’’ – they did not set up ‘’auto/ self service machines’’, they did not encourage ‘’on-line services’’ or ‘’phone banking’’ to avoid queues. So you feel you are wasting time physically queuing.

So, in Singapore, it’s easy right? You call up the hotline. It says, press 1 for ABC, 2 for DEF, 3 for XYZ…. 8 options to press, and press # to speak to an operator. And then you press 2, they say press 1 for D1, 2 for D2, 3 for D3, 4 for E1, etc….. 8 more options. And if you are not sure and hazard a number and it’s wrong, you start all over again, or press 0 to ‘’go to the main menu’’. And when you press # to speak to the operator, it puts you on hold or on more recorded messages, or ask you to key in your account number… and when you key in, and finally get to speak a real person at the other end, the first thing she asks for is your account number….

Or, if you are very ‘’in’’, you do internet instead. But you have to make sure you have the right computer software for that particular service provider’s website, and you spend time understanding and downloading the software, and then your PC hangs, or the downloading was not successful….

The point is – the time spent pressing 1,2 3, ABC, and downloading and un-hanging your PC…is probably a lot more than simply waiting patiently and serenely at the queue….

The marketing lie of ‘’doing it whenever and wherever you want’’ with internet transaction is just that – a lie. What is the percentage of the population who does their transaction at 3 am at the pub? Haven’t you realised why the staff strength at 24 hour hotline call centres is skeletal?!

So what is the problem? To me, Singaporeans do not know how to face silence with equanimity; they must constantly occupy their minds with ‘’emptiness’’. Instead of being sociable or chat in a friendly manner with fellow queue-ers in the line, they prefer to be anti social and look busy with empty talk over sms, or to occupy their mind with stresses like on-line and hotline services.

By being ‘’occupied’’ and busy all the time, we appear more hardworking and ‘’efficient’’.

Conversations

With the Laundry Man - Tue 6 Dec
It’s been only three days that I’ve been back, and I have not lost the Perugian ‘’sociable-ness’’.

In Perugia, people make time for one another, and chat casually.

Today I had a pleasant conversation with John, the dry-clean delivery man. I enquired about his wife’s health, and he asked about my trip. I learnt about their impending trip to Egypt with his whole extended family, a ‘’gift’’ paid for by their son, and about how his wife would enjoy it and should go, despite the advanced state of cancer that she is in now.

To think that I used to be mad with John’s long-windedness and slowness in handling the form-filling when he picked up my clothes at the office. I am the busy executive always in a hurry and have little time.

To think that I was once mad with him for not showing up at the appointed time, and was pretty inflexible as he tried to ask for half an hour’s extension. It was only later when he showed up that he explained the reason – he had been stuck at the hospital as he had to accompany his wife who was going through her cancer ‘’relapse’’.

With the Captain - Fri 9 Dec
Anu and I wanted to watch the sunrise at Four Friends, Captain Blake’s boat. He invited us to breakfast. We started talking about Shakespeare, Kipling and Emily Bronte.

Anu said that somehow Shakespeare lost relevance for her, that other authors have written about the same themes in a ‘’better’’ way. Captain differed. I suggested that Shakespeare’s themes are still relevant today, except perhaps he has not written about the sense of alienation in the modern world.

He liked my comment. And we went further… the modern world can be so ‘’uniform’’ and ‘’boring’’. Every where you go you see ‘’standardisation’’ [‘’globalisation’’ is the ‘’better word’’ here – in signages, in transport system, in currency (eg Euro), etc] - so much so that a great chunk of history is lost (esp. trashing certain currencies to adopt the Euro) and you can get ‘’disappointed’’ when you visit another country and see the same things. I was at a mall in Jakarta this July and it felt like I was in one of Singapore’s non-descript malls – there was BreadTalk, Mphosis, Guardian…We talked about ‘’quality and pace of life’’, about how Singapore can afford to slow down and be less materialistic and still be happy….

Anu argued that Singapore cannot afford to slow down – that though we work very hard, we have a good life, and a good, sound system. Compare us with other countries – developed ones, or poor ones – whose systems do not even encourage people to work, because of the dole system, for example.

Captain clarified – no we are not saying we don’t continually improve, but don’t ignore the human expect – the balance that New Zealanders seem to be able to find.

I explained – we are trapped. We work in companies that tell us we are never good enough. We slaved for the company, we clinched big contracts, we made huge profits. But shareholders say this is not enough. They say it’s good but it’s not enough. More can be made – either through more sales, more profit, cutting costs, acquiring another company or merging with another. That’s the only way to increase the value of your company and share price. (And fatten shareholders’ bank accounts, I guess.)

Captain Blake kept telling us to ‘’take our time to enjoy the sea, no hurry’’. Yet we had our habit – of time-keeping, of rushing, of keeping to our ‘’goal’’. The leader of the MIS team building session could not help reminding us about time keeping and the time to meet – for our obstacles/ team challenges.

Waking up in Another Country

‘’Quando i bambini fanno oohh…!’’ I woke up with this jingle in my head. What is it? It took me some time to recall – it’s for Kinder chocolates’ TV commercial in Italy! How could I forget – when I got back only yesterday, and when this lovely commercial played nightly as I sat in front of the TV with Franca.

Jalene, May Ling and Wah Lee visited my dad in the afternoon. They got my sms a few days ago about my dad’s condition and without hesitation, almost immediately organised a visit. So many changes happened just this past one week, one month.

But one thing has not changed – our friendship. We have been friends for about 25 years. We gather during Christmas, Chinese New Year and birthdays. As we age, and as our parents age, we also gather at hospitals and funeral wakes – to visit our ailing parents and grandparents, and to console the bereaved.

Day of Departure - Fri 2 Dec

I woke up and the table is laid out with a different coffee maker, cookies, a small tube of Baci, a satsuma and an orange.

I did not expect this – I still have my own bread and cereal for breakfast…. Touched by Franca’s thoughtfulness, I could not eat much, just a biscuit and the tiny satsuma. There was hardly luggage space even for the orange and so I took the small tube of Baci, just to show my appreciation. But she insisted on the orange – she had just bought some yesterday (thinking I love them because I had bought and offered her some the past two days) and said I should take it for the journey.

More last minute packing while she asked if I had left behind anything. She came to my room to give me my mobile (which was lying at the breakfast table) saying I should not forget it. She brought me my face towel too and I told her there was no space for it. I told her I could not pack in my bath towel either. She tried to find space in my hand luggage, everywhere. I told her my luggage would be overweight, and that she could have them if she did not mind, or she could keep them for other tenants, after washing them, for they were newly bought from Conti when I first came. She thanked me profusely and said they were so nice I should try and take them back if possible.

Finally, it was time to say the last goodbye. I thanked her for what she has done and apologised for not being to express my thanks adequately in Italian. I surprised myself when I choked at this sentence, and she fought back her tears too. How strong she must be – to be saying tearful farewells now and then to departing tenants.

She helped me call a taxi. They wanted to arrive in five minutes. Ten minutes, I bargained, buying time to go to the loo and to secure my luggage. But I waited for more than that and it never arrived. Franca had to call again, and it was the first time I heard her yelling. Apparently they claimed that they had been too busy, but now they promised the driver would come immediately. Meanwhile, while waiting, Giselle passed by, and we hugged and kissed farewell. After another eternity, the taxi finally arrived. Imagine waiting a total of 35 minutes, for a 10 minute ride to the bus terminal!

Preparing for Singapore’s Fast Pace
The journey to the Rome airport was pleasant. The sky was bright and sunny, much more cheerful than Perugia.

More than half way into the journey, and I was already busy ‘’working’’ the phone with sms and calls. Sms from office to say the Asia Coms meeting has been cancelled at the last minute. Calls to HQ to find out why. Sms to Singapore to say I could join the MIS team building, in view of the cancelled Coms meeting. Sms from headhunter after that to say client wanted conference call on the day of my off-site team building. Sms to headhunter to say that I need to re-schedule. More sms – about the Coms meeting cancellation logistics and my passport details for the offsite. Very productive, very active, very frantic, very Singapore.

The bus conductor broke my frantic working mode. As he came round to collect my bus fares, he asked for the time of my flight. Then he asked if I had heavy luggage. I asked why. He said the bus would arrive late at the airport – about an hour late! ‘’Va bene?’’ (is it OK) he asked. Do I have a choice? It would mean a terrible rush for check in, and unless there was no long queue, I might not even make it. I asked for the reason for the delay and he mentioned something which sounded like ‘’demonstration’’ and I had thought it was a ‘’strike’’ (thought ‘’strike’’ should be ‘’sciopero’’ instead).

We made it to the airport 20 minutes late instead of the anticipated one hour. But the slowness and long queue at the check-in counter meant I had little time left for anything, except go round a merry hunt for the custom’s stamp for my tax free form.

In one week, so many things, including life and death matters, happened. I felt bad the Asia Coms meeting has to be cancelled – it was because of my stay in November in Italy that the meeting had to be pushed to December, and now it has to be cancelled, due to some urgent matter. But who can plan and predict what will happen and who or what you’ll meet, and when? All the more I want to just grasp and treasure what’s in front of us. Despite difficulties and obstacles, I had made it to, and back from Italy. I am not sure if it’s ‘’stubborness’’, perseverance or plain bull-headed.

Toasting to Dad's Health

Last day in Perugia. I had ‘’farewell lunch’’ at Shanghai Chinese Restaurant on Corso Garibaldi with Jodi, Halina, Mirlan and Kayoko. They waited for me to arrive at our meeting point - Palazzo Gallenga – before walking to the restaurant nearby. I was late – thanks to my obsession with emailing at the internet café.

When we reached the restaurant, Halina wanted to order wine - her treat, she said. So we toasted – to friendship, and especially to my dad’s health.

They tried to cheer me up. Halina saw my sad face and tried to mother me. We bantered. We said that we should meet again next year, perhaps in this very same restaurant. Halina wants a grandchild badly and wishes that when we meet she would be able to bring her grandchild along – her daughter who is married is a career woman not keen on having kids. I said I would meet Halina in Spoleto next summer – for the festival she is organising. Jodi explained why she likes Europe and wants to live in Europe instead of in Australia – the Australians ‘’do not know anything other than about themselves’’, according to her.

We all seem to have similar ‘’complaints’’ about our own countries. This trip to Italy is more than language learning for me. It is a lesson in kindness and friendship, and an opportunity to learn from one another – about Australia, Poland, Japan, Khirgistan, even the U.S. I had thought that I knew Japan well enough, but have learnt so much from Kayoko about the values and thoughts of the Japanese. I had thought that the Polish would not know Singapore. But Halina has a mental image – she ‘’knows’’ Singapore as a country with quality products, and clothing made in Singapore are highly regarded there! And I do not know much about Poland or Khirgistan… there are still so many countries I have not visited nor learnt about.

We talked and talked. We spent hours at the restaurant, and I wondered when they would chase us out. We finally left to go our separate ways. Jodi cried. We choked back tears. We passed by Palazzo Gallenga one last time, and an elderly lady asked if we needed a room – she could rent one to students like us. ‘’Oh no – today’s our last day here in fact,’’ Jodi said.

I walked under the Arco Etrusco one last time. I wanted to go to my favourite pastry shop one last time, and to find out the actual name of the shop. I just could not figure out the cursive writing on the signage! But I forgot – it is Italy and lunch hour – all shops, except restaurants, are closed!

I walked to the city centre, hoping to snap more shots in the dark gloomy sky for remembrance. I decided to go to the Perugina shop to get more Baci chocolates for friends back home. When I was ready to pay with my credit card, the old lady told me the terminal was not functioning due to ‘’tech problems’’ and told me to wait for about 10 minutes. I returned, and it was still not working. I wanted to leave but she offered to make a call but before long a young lady rushed in – it turned out that she was the only one in the shop who knew how to use the terminal – gosh!

I went home, reminding myself I needed to start packing… I met Adele, who gave me a big hug as she left the house.

I decided to make time to chat with Franca before I got down to packing. I told her about the lunch we had, the dinner I would be having with Kumi, and that she still has not called to arrange time and place to meet. ‘’Don’t worry, eat with me if she can’t have dinner with you, I’ve already prepared…’’ she said, ever so generously.

I started packing, frantically. I wondered how to squeeze in all that shopping and heavy bulky books. Franca came in to show me the hand-made tagliatelle, together with a sausage that she had kept aside for my dinner (I had drooled over the tagliatelle when she was making them but still have not tried them!). ‘’Oh thank you so much – but I have spoken with Kumi and we are going out,’’ I said. ‘’Nevermind… tomorrow…’’ Franca replied, and left the room with the pot of tagliatelle.

I had asked Kayoko to join us for dinner at La Lumera. I introduced her to Kumi. Kayoko gave me a card and a packet of Japanese ‘’body warmer’’ (she had given one to me earlier and it really helped to keep me warm), and left after the first course, as she still had not started to pack. We hugged and kissed and bade a warm farewell. We promised to meet either in Japan or in Singapore.

After dinner with Kumi, I walked back, and wanted to spend my last few hours with Franca. I took out my laptop and sat with her as I downloaded the pictures I had just taken at the restaurant.

She kept asking about calling a taxi the next morning, and whether I should be taking the bus or the train to Rome. ‘’Tomorrow at this time you will be gone and I’ll be here alone,’’ she said, quietly. I wished I could thank her enough for allowing me to stay two extra nights – on 31st Oct and 1st Dec! (The rental paid is for a month - 1 to 30 Nov)

We normally sang out our ‘’buona notte’’ (good night) as we left for bed but this time, it was ‘’good bye’’. She even came into my room and said, ‘’un bacione’’ as she gave me a big goodbye kiss. She again reminded me not to forget anything, while I told her I was going to leave behind my clothes detergent and shower cream for her and she thanked me profusely.

I went back to packing, re-packing, and finally finished packing. I set my alarm on my mobile, and tried to get some sleep.

Last Day in Perugia

Panettone and Perugina
Monday 28th was our last lesson with our ‘’grammar exercise’’ teacher Maria. We were hardly in the mood. She had wanted to let us listen to a passage from the tape but seeing us so restless, decided to skip it and do a shorter exercise on colours and idioms instead.

She brought us a panettone to try during our break. Sylvester had to leave class early but she insisted on opening it before break time and ‘’made’’ him eat a slice while we watched.

Maria is such a mother hen. She had reminded us so many times about our appointment time at the bus stop at Piazza Italia for the trip she has organised for us - our trip to Perugina chocolate factory.

The story of the famous and Italy’s beloved Baci is charming. As early as back in 1922, the founder already knew that ‘’naming’’ is important for marketing and changed the name from pugno (punch) to baci (kiss). Pugno came about by accident when the confectioner created a chocolate in a round shape topped with a nut and it looked like a fist and hence people started calling it ‘’punch’’.

And back then they too knew the importance of advertising – and created such memorable and popular TV commercials. And yes, who can avoid globalisation? The Swiss conglomerate Nestle bought over the financially-ailing business in 1988. Thank goodness they did not lose their romance and creativity in the pursuit for ‘’segmentation’’ and ‘’targeting’’ and created marketing campaigns with such clever play of Italian verbs like ‘’tubare’’ (to coo – like lovers and doves) and hence came up with a cute jingle ‘’tu-bi-amo’’ (tubiamo – we coo) to market their chocolates packaged into small tubes – just nice for the youths to carry around as snacks.

While at Perugina, Maria was her usual bubbly self and continued to be like a school m’am looking after her brood of excursion-going kids and pointing out monuments along the way. In the bus Kayoko seems to have a similar urge of mine to ‘’piece jigsaw puzzles together before we leave’’ and asked her so many questions. Where was she from – Venezuela? After that which part of Italy did she move to? How many languages does she speak? How about Marina our other teacher?

At the end of the whole trip Maria gave those of us who would be leaving Perugia and not continue our studies hugs and kisses and lots of good wishes.

Canzione (song)
For our first language lab class we had a love song with Cristina. Yesterday at our last lesson we requested for songs again – it was fun listening and trying to understand songs and TV commercials. But it was a sad love song about a love that has just ended.

Last Grammar Class
Marina was griping about having to move house twice – her own and her mum in law’s. But she still wanted to be with us for our last three hours to ‘’give us good wishes’’. Few of us were in the mood for more grammar and she decided to let us ask her all sorts of questions instead – on the language or on the culture. Maybe she felt compelled to teach us more stuff and at the last hour, decided to explain about relative pronouns and gave us a ‘’piccolo piccolo’’ (real small) exercise and referred us to a page in the text book. She co-authored the book and could remember the pages by heart. She co-authored a dictionary she frequently referred to as well – isn’t she brava!

Finally, it was more photos, more thank you’s and good wishes and we actually broke into loud applause for her as we dashed to the bus stop to look for Maria who would lead us to Perugina.

Just Once
Mirlan the gallant young chap again offered to carry my bag as we heaved up the slope with my laptop and schoolbag. ‘’Ok lah, let him help once, since it’s the second time he’s asked and there will be no more next time’’ I thought. So I gladly handed him my bag. Kayoko just laughed and I whispered – should have given him my laptop instead – it’s heavier.

Email Addiction Not Eliminated
Give me another year in Italy and it will still not be eliminated. Even after a tiring thunderstorm-trip to Todi, on my way back in the dark evening, I had to drop by the internet café near my house to check something. The chap by now recognised me as he stood at his door smoking and gave me a big smile and ‘’buona sera’’!

Last evening I dropped by again after Perugina and was trying to google ‘’angiogram’’ when Santo, who lives nearby, dropped by too and squeezed my arm by way of a surprise ‘’hello’’ for me.

I finished what I had to check and went over to his cubicle to say a final goodbye. He wanted to say something but forgot what. Then he remembered – ‘’so I won’t get to see you again?’’ No, I shook my head. And we gave each other a long big hug, and promised we will keep working on our Italian and keep in touch.

Franca and Friends
Adele and Giselle visited in the early evening as usual two days ago. Adele had knitted two bonnets and brought them to let Franca and Giselle try. I think they were for them. We chatted and I persuaded them to let me take a photo of them. Giselle mentioned she had been to Singapore and it was lovely. She used to visit her sister (who has since died – Franca told me afterwards) who lived in Australia and that’s when she decided to stop over in Singapore.

As they left Franca, they gave me long big hugs when Franca told them I was leaving soon and said, ‘’but you will be still be here for two more days – we will still see you right?’’

Discussing Illness in Italian
I had not learnt many medical terms in Italian – at classes here or in Singapore. But when the need comes, you manage – with gestures, guesses, dictionary, alternative words, a lot of stutters and perhaps a lot of compassion from an old lady.

I was trying to explain to Franca that my dad has had a heart attack two days ago, and that my brother had told me I need not rush back. He would be going for angioplasty today, and had been in intensive care for the past two days.

Today I tried to update her, after speaking to my brother, that previous visits to the doctors had not detected or suspected anything grave, despite my dad’s bad headaches.

Strange, many French words started coming in, when we talked about my flight back home, how to get to Rome from here, how long it takes and when I would finally get to see my dad on Saturday. And yet when talking to “il francese” (Roland) about my job and life in Singapore, Italian words got in the way instead. When he finally said he was going home to ‘’la padrona’’ I didn’t understand him. Did he mean ‘’the landlady’’ in Italian or was he mixing it up and saying the boss - le patron - in French? Franca had to translate – ‘’sua moglie’’ (his wife - the boss)

Tomorrow at this hour as I write this, I will still be on the plane, anxious to get home. Italian, French, Spanish, English… heck! I have not spoken Singlish for a long while, and look forward to that with my family members.

Grandmother Tales

As days passed Franca started to tell me stories of the other students who had stayed with her.

I am not sure if it is because I have become more communicative (with my slightly more fluent Italian), or because she has learnt to understand my accent, or learnt to guess what I say and hence able to at times even correct my verb conjugation(rather than shake her head and not catch what I was trying to say). Maybe it’s because we are more familiar with each other and she felt chattier. Maybe it’s a combination of all factors.

Her tales are pretty interesting. She said all the Japanese girls who stayed with her seem to love Italian food. One of them put on 6 kg within three months – eating desserts, pasta, ravioli and as many as five sausages for dinner.

She mentioned about an English girl who cried frequently at first because of the death of her boyfriend two months before her arrival. And about how she finally felt better and started taking singing classes at the Uni and how beautifully she sang in the house.

She chuckled over another girl who got completely lost while driving to another city because of miscommunication with Franca, who had given her instructions to another place instead.

She told me that she has removed her alarm system when I told her I was going home late one night. This is because, when she had the alarm system once, after a late and drunken night, no matter how much the girl had been reminded to ‘’deactivate’’ the alarm system, she had forgotten everything and had set off the loud alarm at 1.00 am, waking the neighbourhood.

Franca also told me gleefully about how she helped a Japanese girl. According to her the Uni’s housing agency is rigid and unsympathetic and once refused to let the girl extend her stay with her. So she told the agency that her room is no longer available because her niece was staying with her and secretly rented the room directly to the girl (and hence by-passing the agency), and refused to answer their follow up call! When the agency rang again, the girl picked up the call and they insisted on speaking to Franca. They asked her, ‘’is your niece a foreigner? She does not sound Italian,’’ and Franca’s reply was, ‘’that was my niece’s classmate who is visiting!’’

Some students who have stayed with her and who subsequently returned to Perugia for further studies requested through the agency to stay with Franca again, causing the agency to ask her, ‘’why is it that everyone wants to stay with you?’’

I am not sure why the other students wanted to stay with her. But I have my own reasons. First, before we got familiar with each other, I was attracted to her cheerfulness. She is elderly and certainly not agile but she is always cheerful and loving. And active – actively knitting, actively hand-making pasta, cooking, doing housework, chatting with friends and writing letters to students who had stayed with her.

After staying with her for a while, I was moved by her concern whenever I mentioned I felt cold. She would lend me her scarves, ask if I needed extra blankets, took my laundry to wash in her machine. She would always be asking me to dress warmly and getting me to sit at the fire to warm myself. She even asked if I was going to be home late so that she could leave some dinner for me. All this is not part of the ‘’package’’ I paid for at the housing agency.

These days she would look forward to my return and barely have I settled into my room and she would ask me to join her at the fire to warm my icy hands. She would hold them to check how cold they are and urge me to put them nearer the fire.

Then she would tell me what happened in the day. For example, once she was mad with her beloved granddaughter Beatrice who had visited her for lunch. They had bisticciare (to bicker – a new vocab I had to look up the dictionary when she used it!) over the boyfriend. Franca met him once and decided she did not like him; she felt he is not the serious and sincere type. Beatrice defended his ‘’long disappearance’’ and absence of regular contacts and insisted they love each other. In the end both lost their appetite - Franca still had a small appetite during dinner! I secretly heaved a sigh of relief for not joining them for lunch – Franca had invited me that morning.

More jig-saw puzzles pieced
I felt the urge to want to know her better and picked up courage to ask about the friends who often visited her and about her personal life.

For example, why does ‘’il francese’’ (‘’the French’’ - that’s what she calls Roland) always give her fresh vegetables? Where does he get them from? Apparently he has some land and grows them!

What are the names of the two ladies who always visited? The “pedicure woman”? Oh – Adele. And the one with white hair? Giselle. Both are widowed and live nearby, according to her.

And Marlene is actually her part time maid, not friend, who comes every Tuesdays and Thursdays.

And at what age did she marry? How did she meet her husband? What did he do? She married at 21, met him at her aunt’s house and he worked as muratore (bricklayer). He even went to work in France for three years when times in Italy were bad and he could not find a job. Those years, he returned home twice a year while she remained behind to raise their only daughter.

During dinner we would watch the news on TV and she would add her comments and explain some of the news in her own words to me.

During my final weekly soap-serial last Friday, I asked her to explain about the lady protagonist’s actions. She had been saying in previous weeks that the woman was involved with her lover’s brother and I didn’t quite understand why. Maybe I had not understood the entire story, or I had not been concentrating (since I tend to work on my laptop while in front of the TV), but it had not occurred me to ask.

Finally I did. And she did a good job explaining, patiently!

Shopping in Perugia

Hat Shopping
Upim – a department chain store, with a branch at the train station. Limited and sad-looking merchandise.

Coin – another small department store with limited stock. I had spent considerable amount of time there bonnet and hat-choosing once but could not bring myself to buy something that makes me look ‘’weird’’ and I would not wear in Singapore.

Finally succumbed to temptation and the tormenting cold and went hat shopping, first at Benetton and then back at Coin.

Fun to be trying on caps like every one else, and wearing one too. Feels very winter, and they do keep you warm! (I was doubtful initially and had thought it was another fashion gimmick to make women spend)

I managed to find the styles that suited me, at Coin! After much hesitation, I bought a blue one as I was wearing a blue scarf then. I had actually wanted a red cap and so bought a red one too, only to have to hunt for a matching scarf. Otherwise I would look so multi colour and I am still not used to coordinating winter wear yet. Coin has pathetic merchandise but at least they had thick long red scarves (more like carpets that truly keep you warm!) that I was looking for. The week before, I managed to get a pair of eyebrow tweezers there too.

New Shops
Perugia may be ancient city but there are new things and changes. A new shop just opened – Sisley.

And another new shop near my house – selling lovely colourful bags. I went in the day before it opened with Kumi – we were attracted by the lights and I had not recalled it being there. When we went in, they gently ‘’chased’’ us out saying that they open the next day, and that was when I realised it was that new.

Old Shops
On my way home, very near my house, there is a friendly internet point – AT Communications. It offers water, clocks showing time zone of other major cities, and is less cramped, brighter and more cheerful. But it’s a few cents more expensive than the one near the Uni (Multitel) where I go to for my work emails. I go there in my first week and now only when I need to urgently check non-work emails because it does not allow laptop hook up.

Just after the internet point is Sidis – a supermarket chain, but this particular one is run by the Chinese. I heard them conversing in Mandarin and decided to ask, ‘’duo shao’’ for the price in Mandarin at the cashier. It’s bigger than the cramped and perpetually crowded Coop in ‘’centro’’ but they are unfriendly and sullen. Maybe the Chinese are simply practical and business-like – no need for greetings or courtesies. Buying groceries is just a business transaction. When someone did give me some help with weighing the fruits, it was an Italian staff that did it!

Along the way home, up and down the slope there are many pretty shops and even an art gallery. But I hardly see any customers! Some looked so posh that I did not want to venture in. One of them does have a sociable lady who looked up from her desk and smiled at me as I walked past one day.

There is a jewellery shop selling beaded and murano glass jewellery. It’s run by a well dressed, haughty and aloof-looking lady. In my early days of arrival I bought a simple pair of ear rings from her because the backing of my existing one dropped off and disappeared.

Along the way are some bars and eateries, all pretty inconspicuous but look cozy.

Next to my house is a friendly pastry shop Lupi. It sells dried goods, some savouries, Italian desserts and ‘’French pastries’’ – panificazione francese. I once bought a slice of pizza for lunch amounting to 1.73 euro and the lady said, ‘’basta’’ (it’s enough) when I handed her 1.70 euro and was digging my purse for 3 cents.

Opposite Lupi is an inconspicuous restaurant with no name! I could only see the lights and kitchen staff busy doing I know not what.

Around ‘’Centro’’
My favourite pastry shop is at Arco Etrusco. The affable and cheerful lady showed and explained all the cakes she had when I asked for suggestions on what dessert to buy for dinner. On my way home after school I like to drop by to get something for Franca and I for dinner. Once the lady explained that the particular sweet I was pointing to was a special Perugian dessert and even listed its main ingredients. I bought it without much hesitation and Franca truly enjoyed it.

Coop on Piazza Matteotti – the cramped and ever crowded ‘’food-only’’ supermarket with limited produce, but with fresh meat and cheese. It does not sell tissue paper! I had to go to a pharmacy which ‘’hid’’ the packets behind its counters. I had to enquire and she handed me a packet, and I had to ask for another one! It seems few buy in bulk here.

At least it’s friendly. I had been to Dr Andreoli Luigi’s Farmacia to get facial cleanser, toner and tissue paper and the pharmacists are as icy as the winds of Perugia.

Next to Coop is a pastry shop, pretty good and famous, according to Franca. It has lovely looking desserts but the people are not very welcoming or helpful. Once I wanted to buy a tart to share with Franca for dinner and the woman first did not make an attempt to understand me (maybe it was my accent but I did pronounce the name correctly) and then when she did, cut a huge portion, even though I wanted a piece for two. Since then, I prefer to patronise Arco Etrusco even though the choice there is limited.

Next to Coop is Conti. It sells yarns for knitting, like a haberdashery store, and practically everything knitted – socks, gloves, scarves, caps, pyjamas, bedroom slippers. I bought my towels there on my arrival.

Arimo on Piazza IV Novembre– a rather expensive store from Milan, selling sleep wear with cute cartoon prints. When I first arrived, the window had a very attractive display of its ‘’Panda collection’’. I bought its pyjamas – my excuse was my delayed luggage and that my pyjamas were inside the luggage. Later I ‘’grew’’ my panda collection with the purchase of a pair of warm bedroom slippers. My excuse then was that the weather was getting too cold to go barefoot at home. I bought a pouch for Yannick at another Arimo branch too. This store has my vote for the most attractive window display and most frequent changes to the displays.

Bubble on Via Calderini sells cheap and cheerful clothes made in China. I went there for woollies/ tops when I felt tired and sick of the very few tops I had brought. I do not plan to go for holidays in winter and simply do not want to spend too much on expensive winter wear, so this shop is a perfect solution for me.

The Trendy Corso Vannucci
Sweet Way is one of the few shops open on Sundays and always crowded with long queues. It was especially crazy and crowded on the first few days of my arrival. I suspect it’s because of the chocolates that they were selling at the Chocolate Festival of Perugia in late October. It is still popular now with locals and tourists. But very expensive. An American commented, ‘’these few pieces of chocolates cost as much as our lunch!’’ Today I bought a slice of dessert; it looked so pretty but it cost me more than 8 euro a slice!

Sandi is a posh bar where you can enjoy hot tea, chocolate or coffee with desserts or savoury snacks. Well dressed executives drop in to buy desserts wrapped in lovely boxes. I often salivate at its windows admiring its pretty cakes. The shop seems to specialise in chocolate cakes in the shape of porcupine. Interesting!

Another posh but very friendly and service-oriented shop is Perugina, selling the city’s pride – Perugina and the famous Baci chocolates. But thanks to globalisation, Nestle now owns this confectionary of Perugian origins. This is where I got Tian Mi Mi her Christmas gift.

Benetton is one of the few shops along this trendy street that don’t close from 1.00 – 3.30 pm for lunch and which opens on Sundays! It is also the first shop I hit to get a pair of jeans and a T-shirt due to luggage delay! Subsequently went in to get a long sleeve top that was on sale and another top. Alas – weather is too cold to wear it and it would be too warm to wear in Singapore!

Farmacia Lemmi is where I brought my box of cold tablets from Singapore and showed the pharmacist to ask if he had the same thing. He was really helpful and patiently explained he has something else similar but less strong, and went on to explain the ingredients. He even explained it a second time in English.

Makan Shops
Osteria dei Turreno on Piazza Danti offers ‘’cucina typica’’, it claims. It is a modest eatery but more like a coffee shop with nasi padang in Singapore. I went there a few times in my first two weeks as it was one way to avoid pizza and other ‘’fast food’’. Also, it is self service, convenient and easy – just point at the food you want. Plus, they are pretty friendly, especially the cashier who speaks English to me even if I managed with my Italian. It seems popular even with Italians despite its location at the city centre, perhaps of its reasonable price.

Next to it is Vodafone shop where I got my cell phone charger and adapter when my luggage was delayed and my phone was dying. Later Kumi got her cell phone and SIM card there with me as her interpreter.

La Grande Muraglia – The Great Wall Chinese restaurant on Via Pinturicchio. I walk past it on way to and back from the Uni. Kayoko and I decided to try it out one day, as it was recommended in a little local guide book.

The menu has interesting errors that confuse the Japanese. For example, fried noodles is placed under ‘’spaghetti’’ section and the Chinese translation became ‘’fried rice’’. So is it Chinese noodle, spaghetti or rice?

They also have interesting dessert like ‘’fried milk’’ (latte fritto) and ‘’Macedonia di frutta cinese’’ (Chinese fruit).

We had dinner there and tried its ‘’student menu’’, applicable only on weekdays. For 5 euro you get a choice of fried rice or noodles and a choice of meat and mineral water. It was great value and the choice of carbo and meat were extensive. I went again today with another Japanese friend, Kumi, for lunch.

The Chinese lady asked in Italian where we were from, Japan? Were we here for studies? She told us she came from Shanghai many years ago and her whole family and relatives are here. Her daughter studied here. No wonder she could not understand Mandarin or English when I tried to ask her on Kumi’s behalf about a certain dish on her menu. I guess it’s ‘’natural’’ for Kumi to expect us to be able to communicate in Chinese but we, both Chinese, ended up using Italian as our common language. It felt a little funny.

The lady bade us a really warm goodbye. I felt strange again – her welcome/ greetings were always very nonchalant, almost cool, but her goodbyes were usually more cheerful.

Dal Mi’ Cocco on Corso Garibaldi is touted to be great value for money for a full meal at 13 euro. It was where I had lunch with Jason and Kayoko. But I did not find the food that tasty, though it is always crowded and recommended in guidebooks.

Pizzeria Mediterranean – small little obscure eatery near Vodafone. It is always crowded because of its yummy and reasonably priced pizza. Huge selection of types of pizza; even dessert pizza with Nutella topping. Serves typical huge pizza per person! Kumi introduced me to this place and I loved to look at the pizzaiolo working in front of us, and the big fire used to grill the pizza. I don’t mind being his apprentice, and learn to knead the dough so skilfully and to use strong arms to take the pizza in and out of the grill.

Pizzeria al taglio – where you can buy pizza by the piece and take away with drinks. Lots of these in Italy. I went to one last Thursday afternoon on my way to school. The friendly chap greeted cheerfully and chatted with me. Are you cold, he asked when he saw me rubbing my hands together? Where are you from? Your country is never cold, right? You are here to study, right? I guess Perugia is a University city and anyone ‘’young-looking’’ and especially foreign-looking is assumed to be a student. I also noticed that shops not located at the city centre are friendlier; this is common sense I guess.

Thunderstorm in Todi

I woke up with a heavy head, bad throat and stuffy nose. Outside, heavy rain was pelting down. I had planned to take the 11.50 am coach to Todi but decided to cancel the day trip.

After breakfast and medication, I went back to sleep. I woke up at 12.30 noon; the rain had stopped.

I felt the great urge to get out of the house to do something: it’s my last weekend in Perugia – I should see more of the region!

There was another coach to Todi at 1.30 pm. I hurriedly dressed, made coffee and ate a slice of bread. Franca saw me and I told her I wanted to catch the bus to Todi, that I was feeling better. She offered the cauliflower and ‘’crostini’’ she had prepared. ‘’Lascia, lavo io’’ she urged as I gulped down the food. (Leave it, let me do the washing up)

It was a very brisk walk to the bus terminal. I skipped the escalators full of people and ran down steps of the staircase next to them. I broke into a run towards the bus terminal, and nearly got run down by a bus as I crossed the road at the terminal. I bought the ticket and boarded the coach just a few minutes before it departed. ‘’Si, signorina, bella studente…., vero?’’ the bus driver answered me with some (presumably) nice words (of which I managed to catch only a few) when I confirmed with him that it was the coach for Todi. Ha ha - he still thought that I am a little signorina (a term used to address women below 18).

Todi, 40km South of Perugia, ‘’quaint’’ and ‘’one of the most enchanting hill towns’’, according to my guide book. The American press and a posh travel magazine actually named it ‘’one of the world’s eminently liveable cities’’. No wonder so many signboards of hotels lined the roads before the coach arrived at the city centre. “And many have actually bought properties there – for vacations or retirement’’ my guidebook added.

Janet Loh moment came – the rain started pouring, fiercely, in tandem with the thunder. When I checked with the driver if it was the town centre where I should alight, the kind driver confirmed it and pointed to the two monuments nearby (the Duomo and Santa Fortunato) that I could visit. He reminded me to wait at this exact place - Piazza Jacopone - at 5 pm to catch the coach back to Perugia.

All wrapped up with my cap, thick scarf and gloves, and with my umbrella, I walked to the Duomo. When I entered there was not a single soul in the huge empty church. It felt weird and irrationally, I feared being locked inside and undiscovered. It must be even weirder to be travelling 40 km in heavy thunderstorm and still suffering from a cold, to visit a little inconspicuous town. Much later a few other tourists entered, and I felt less of a weirdo.

I roamed aimlessly around Piazza del Popolo and wandered into Cisterne Romane to view the remains of an elaborate underground wells and cisterns of this medieval city.

After roaming in the empty streets and looking sadly at the unopened shops in this empty ghost town, and with my umbrella fighting with the wind, I decided to go into a café for a hot cup of tea. I had arrived at past 2.00 pm and the only shops open were eateries. The others would re-open after lunch at 3.30 pm at the earliest.

When the rain got lighter, it was also about time to catch the 5.00 pm coach back. I decided to dash up the hundreds of steps where the massive Franciscan shrine of Santa Fortunato sits, for a quick look.

I only managed to see my guidebook’s greatly recommended ‘’high renaissance masterpiece’’ - Temple of Santa Maria della Consolazione - from the warm coach, as it drove past the monument on our way back to Perugia.

When I finally returned home in the near empty coach, barely dry and with bottoms of my jeans drenched, Franca gave a cry of welcome back. We both laughed about the ‘’ tante acqua’’ (lots of water) that poured the minute I left home. She commented it was brave of me to take bus in heavy thunderstorm and alone, to go sightseeing.

I think it was more like ‘’foolhardy’’ and not thinking of consequences such as developing pneumonia!